I'm going into 2009 with
tentative steps. As mentioned in previous posts, I've been dealing with daily bouts of dizziness. They are not so
debilitating that I can't function in my daily life because I can. My balance is not off, my strength and cognitive functions seem to be up to par. I just kind of walk around with a slight sway. When I sit down, sometimes...not always....I will feel a wave of motion crash around me and I will get vertigo. But if I switch positions or move, it tends to go away. I am able to exercise and actually feel really good while doing it. It's just the rest of the time I dread.
I was referred to physical therapy by my primary doctor and I have been twice. The guy I'm working with is a sort of "dizzy specialist", yet he can't seem to figure out specifically what is wrong. Last session, he halted therapy and referred me to an
ENT. As is typical with a specialist, I have to wait 2.5 weeks until I can get in.
If anything, the mental stress of not knowing what is wrong with me can certainly get me down. That is why I haven't been checking in with my posts as often as I have in the past. I am daily working on positive mental attitude and positive thoughts, but as a naturally pessimistic person, this has been a slow going process. The smallest changes I have made in regards to
PMA is that I try to acknowledge the good things - sometimes I have 3 good things in a hour, sometimes I can get 10 good things in a day.
The other thing I need to remember is that I'm not dying. I'm here today. I'm alive. I'm well enough to walk around and take care of my children. As I learned last month in my perspectives lessons, I want to be grateful and happy for the big and little things in my life that ARE going right.
My daily (hourly, minutely) affirmations include: "This will work out", "I can handle this", and "Everyday I am getting better".
Chase has now crawled into my office and found me and is threatening to push buttons on the computer, so off I go. I should get back into regular posts soon...I hope.
